Judgement Day

I spend my day being judged....

EVERYONE is ALWAYS thinking about me.  When they come to work, they've been wondering about me all morning.  When they leave work at night, they think about me all night long. They probably talk about me with their family.  Most people are going to look at my outfit and think about the color and if it's right for me.  Some will think-that is too small. That is way to big.  She needs her hair cut. She is going to eat that?  She said what?  She is not as smart as me.  She does not have her act together. She is too dramatic.  She worries too much.  She doesn't have enough friends.  She is not very organized.
That was no good. That made no sense. That didn't matter. Is she mad? Do they think I did the wrong thing? 

OK-That is sarcastic of course (nobody is really thinking about me all that much).  But I spend WAY too much time wondering if I'm accepted or if people think negative things about me. I am aware it is such a waste of time. I realize it's not worth it.  Most of those people that I'm afraid are judging me are probably not even thinking about me at all!  But it's hard for me to get away from this worry.

The reason I am bringing this up is because I have a big fear that people are going to judge me for something that is not even really "me".  Recently I had a few good friends comment on a song I had on my blog.  I don't change the music that often but I bug my sister all the time to change hers because I listen to her music daily and I love to hear new stuff.  I never thought twice that maybe someone was waiting for me to change my songs. 

My friends meant nothing, no harm, no judgement.  But it opened my eyes that someone, any reader,  could judge me on music or pictures or words that I put on my blog. I guess that is the risk you take when you blog.

Last night I added quite a few songs to my blog.  And just so you CAN'T judge me, I won't explain any of the songs except one (see next blog post).  But for all you readers out there I just want you to know that some songs were added because I have a personal connection to the song.  Others were added because I love the artist. Some I just like the sound. Some it may be the lyrics.  A few songs were added JUST BECAUSE.  You will never know.  That is something that is locked inside of me and cannot be judged no matter what.  Of course YOU won't judge me but the important thing is for me to feel like I won't be judged.

Yes I like oldies, I listen to my share of country music. I've always been a mellow girl. I have a few favorite artists.  I connect to some lyrics and others it's a beat I can bounce to.   I changed the setting so that you have to press play now, so the same annoying song won't play over and over and over for you if you want it silent.  So listen. Or don't listen.  And I can just relax and change the music in a few weeks.  If you want to hear something-give me a request and I'll add it. Leave it in the comments and I'll add it for YOU!