Back in the day...

Back in the day we were the Blue Devils and we were proud.

We worked hard...together. We broke a sweat every single day.  And it kept us in shape, healthy and together.

We wore fake glasses. Did TONS of dishes. Argued about the thermostat.  Threw parties and went to our fair share (ok a lot!).  We played Dr. Mario and ordered pizza. 

Blood sweat and tears.  We shared a dorm room during pre season. We cried in purple sweat pants. We designed fleeces, sweat pants and tshirts for team pride.  We complained about the coach-oh HOW we did that.  We bonded over spaghetti dinners, long bus rides and together cursed our injuries.

We got tired. We were dirty. We had to figure out who got to shower after practice every day.  We smelled each others shin guards.  I'm sure we shared socks. We ran hard, we pushed each other, we slapped a million high fives and thanked our lucky stars that the other was there when we were on the field.  We survived freshman initiation and lived to laugh about it.  We became to be in charge of warm ups and yelled at the under class-women.  We met eyes across the stretch circle.  We ate together.  I cooked.  Stacy always won Dr. Mario and was the fashionista, fighting off all the boys.  Lynne was a listening ear who took the SLAP for my illegal 21st birthday. We wore black.

 

Soccer was my life in college.  But mainly because of these girls.  These life long friends are ones that I only get to see 1 or 2 times a year.  We easily slip into constant conversation....talking about life as it is now and how it was then.  The things we survived together....we laugh, have a drink and now we parent.

All three of us are mothers to some very beautiful children.  This past weekend we spent running around in circles-stacy chasing a 9 month old army-crawler. Lynne bent over wiping spit up.  And me nursing and changing poopy after poopy diaper.  We went to the zoo. This ended up being more for ourselves as the littles we strapped in and we got to just walk and talk. 

We ate, drank and were merry just to be together. 

It is interesting to share our different mothering loves and hates, our schedules, tasks that our husbands are good at and not so great at.  We watched the 2 girls interact while Hugh just got passed around.



Ada tries to steal Tylin's pacifier




Tylin says NO WAY



And although I am exausted today-I can't stop thinking about these women in my life and how much I wish they lived closer. 

Lynne-thanks for traveling. What a trooper.
Stacy-thanks for your jazz hands, opening your house, providing St. Germain's and bib after bib after bib.

I can't wait to post next year when the kids are totally different.

My Engineer

He's been working on the railroad....

For a boy who loves trains...these overalls are the perfect fit.

Wednesday...

Is it Wednesday already?  This week is flying by. 

Today we are recovering from a terrible nights sleep.  Who knows why...Andy and I have beaten our heads against the wall trying to figure it out.  Isn't that what parents do?  Discuss, talk, argue about what is causing their baby to wake.  And then just when they think they have figured it out, someone suggests something else that could be the cause. 

So I'm indulging in some caffeine.  Although I know I don't really feel any different when I have some-it's all a mental game.

Today we are all breakfasted, 2 cartoons in and finished finger painting.  It's only 9:01.  Oh yeah, I changed 4 diapers, nursed and checked my email.  I was lucky enough to read 5 pages in my book while I nursed. 

At the beginning

I haven't finger painted with Eli before and I've been really looking forward to it.  Somewhere in my dreams I imagined him painting for hours and hours.  I thought he'd create all these neat paintings that I would want to frame and hang all over the house.  I've waited a long time to get moving on this project because I wanted to make sure that I did it on a day when I wouldn't care at all about the mess.  I taped paper all over the table so that he could just splatter anywhere.  I was extremely disappointed that it only lasted 15 minutes. Even when I sat down and painted with him he was ready to be done.  I still love to finger paint, but I guess he isn't totally into it.  But we're not giving up.  We'll keep trying.  Anyone have any cool finger painting tips? 

At the end

Hughie is still mellow fellow during the day and a  little tougher at night.  We were blessed with him sleeping really good chunks at my sisters house.  But he reverted back to 1-3 hour chunks at home.  What a tease.  Not funny Hugh!  But he is still such a joy.  So so so sweet.  Smiling and cooing and really focusing on us and knowing us now. 

Our tree is blooming. If you've been a reader of mine you know that every spring I take pictures of the tree on our front lawn.  It's so pretty and only lasts a few days.  Hugh was already in Packer gear and so was Andy, so Eli and I also put on our Packer apparel and we headed out to the tree for a photo shoot.  I actually captured the brothers together and it made my heart swell so much when I looked at them the other night.  I am SO proud to be a mama of brothers.

I hear it gets increasingly difficult to get pictures of your 2 or 3 littles as they get older.  I should be happy to get them with both of them facing the same direction. 

My favorite

Here's to a happy or wacky Wednesday...whichever you choose.  Eli's calling for me to find all the "Play" mail he hid for me.  I love this job!

Tidbits

Here are some tidbits...

I'll be traveling tomorrow.  We're going far and wide.  I'm taking the 2 little boys in my life on a road trip.  We're going to visit "For the Love of Naps" aka-my awesome sister Sarah (her boys and husband too).  Luckily for this LONG drive, my mom (The famous Grandma Barb) will be riding with us.  I  can't wait to spend some time with my sister, her kiddos, see Ed's smirk as he maybe pours a drink Saturday night and talk my moms ear off. 

One of my friends have given me one of the best compliments (For the second time) today. She said "You sound so happy".  I'm so glad I sound happy because I am.  I know it's true-I've been dancing in the kitchen a lot and not caring if the neighbors are chuckling at me.  BUT-  I had my first big time cry last night. It was one of those continuous ugly cries.  Just when you thought I might be done, something else would set me off -and it was all because I started thinking about going back to work.  Eli asked "You ok mama?".  I said "no I'm not ok" (probably not the best thing to say) and he said "why not?" and  said "Because I dont' want to go back to work" and he said "Why?" (love that question) and daddy took over and said "Because she wants to stay with you".  I'm just not ready to go back.  I'm too happy and if others are noticing how happy I am,it must be REAL.

Went to a  gluten free expo over the weekend.  It was so fun.  Andy carried Hugh in the front pack while Eli had a special day with Grandma and Grandpa.  We got to test over 100 gluten free products.  It was awesome. Afterwards I looked at Andy and I said "I loved trying all deserts without explaining that I need it to be gluten free".  Thanks to my mom and dad for letting us go without Eli-he would have been a hand full.  I still can't wrap my head around being gluten free for the rest of my life.  I just want menu freedom.  After we even got to check out the movie The Hunger Games and enjoyed every second.  I only checked my phone 3 times to check on the boys.  This was the first time Andy and I both left Hughie. 

Another great thing about our weekend was the drive to the gluten free expo was about 2 hours.  Because Eli wasn't in the car talking to  us,Andy and I got a chance to talk.  It's been a while since we talked about something other than our kids.  We talked about vacations (past and future), politics, religion, family etc.  It was awesome. 
I put a few new songs on my blog again.  I wonder if anyone listens. 

Last week I went to lunch with my mom, a friend and her mom. Oh and her beautiful new baby girl.  It was a great get away and hilarious that we both wanted to scarf our food and not deal with our kiddos that squawked occasionally.

Congrats to my friends D and M on their new baby girl.  (And prayers for D to recover fast and furious) She was born the same size as Hugh. When we went to visit she was half the size of him...meaning Hugh has grown SO MUCH.  He sits up in your lap now (leaning against you of course) and his head was so big compared to her. I can't believe he was ever that size and made me teary to think that smallness has passed. 

Who watches Downton Abby?  We just started watching and I'm loving it.

I started working out a little bit.  Anyone work out post partum lose their supply? I've heard t be careful.  I asked my OB about it and he said as long as you stay hydrated you should not lose your milk supply.  I have a great supply right now and am SO proud of the stash in our freezer. I don't want to start stressing about it, but I need the stress relief of a work out and also want to try to whip my body in shape.  Has anyone else lost their supply when they started working out?

Congrats to my Friend JG-exciting things to come in her life.  Shout out to you to let you know I think about you and your excitement all the time.

Eli continues to cry for an hour before bed and yells before his clock turns green in the am.  waiting it out.  it's a stage- RIGHT? right! (right?)  He just doesn't seem conditionable.  What I mean is, I just don't think he learns like others-be consistet and he'll get it.    But he doesn't.

I love to watch a show that Andy loves and laughs at. It just MAKES. MY. DAY.  We watch 2 shows together. Only 2 shows.  Survivor and Modern Family. He laughs at both....love it.  I'll miss him tons this weekend.  I hope he misses all of us too. 

More to come....  

Sir Hugh: 2 months

Dear Hugh,

Happy 2 months buddy!  I decided to write a letter to you instead of you addressing the world because lets face it-I know you just as well as you know yourself.

Let me tell you about you.  You are cooing.  You are smiling. You have even giggled.

You had your 2 month visit with the doctor.
He said you are perfect.  You smiled and pooped for him.  Good job.

You are 12.5 lbs  (55%ile)
You are 24 inches (95 %ile)
Your head is at the 80%ile.

The doctor called you lean because you are long but average weight.  You are the size Eli was at 5 months, so this seems awesomely huge to me.  I love every single one of your rolls...keep 'em coming.

You took your shots just like a soldier.  But later that night you had your first real fussy time and it lasted about 3 hours.  Other than that clump of time, you have been an exceptionally mellow fellow.

You are predictable and easy to please.  I have you figured out...for now. 



You are full of expressions.  I love them all. Most would see you like this:

Everyone says you are so serious.  And I would say that 80% of the time you live up to this.  But, oh boy you have lots of other joyous expressions.  I am working on capturing them all. 

 You usually keep your hands in very tight fists.  You are ready to take anyone out.

Every day I spread your fingers and there are little blue lint balls between your fingers and in the soft creases of your hands.  It makes me giggle and shake my head.

You sleep in your crib in your room and have since about 2-3 weeks old.  You are just too loud.  You breathe loud. You burp, gurggle, burbble, furbble.  Any noise-you do it.  Usually you are most loud as you fall asleep but it continues all night long.  You are sleeping 3-6 hour chunks-more often than not 3 hours at a time.  You are taking great naps during the day.  You wake up screaming but calm very fast.

One word to describe you is sweet.  You are just the sweetest boy.  I can't say a mean thing about you!  I love every little inch and every little movement.  I adore you in so many ways.  Each day I take at least 10 minutes to eat you up.  I literally sneak away during a feeding time, diaper change or whenever and give you kisses and cuddles.  I need this and you seem to enjoy it.  This won't ever end until you push me away and I'll still come at you with my mommy arms ready to snuggle.

I love to nurse you.  You are fast and furious.  You love to shake your head to get in the right position and it's a total work out for you. You come up for air but you are breathing as if you just ran a mile.  Makes me smile.  You usually have your eyes wide open and hardly ever look up at me, even if I talk to you or someone else.   

Your Godfather is Uncle KJ and your Godmother will be Aunt Emma.  These 2 will teach you tons and will guide you on your way.

Your hair is not growing, but you haven't lost it either.  Your eyes are dark blue.  You have big feet.  You love your swing. You are swaddled at night and you haven't said but your bath is satisfactory to you.  

For you I would sing "I won't let you go" by James Morrison.  Not sure if it's a love song-but it is what I would sing to you to remind you that I will always be there and you will never be alone. EVER. Have you heard it?  Hughie Lou-go listen to it.

When I'm with you, I can't blink. I can't miss a single minute.  I want you to grow, learn and accomplish-but not too fast.  Please not too fast.  I need you in the crook of my arm for days and days and days.  My hand will be here to hold, to high five, to guide, to push you forward and to grasp when needed. 

Don't let me turn around and see you as a teenager.  Take your time. Be a little brother. A son. Be a baby.  I love you to the moon and back.  My heart swells for you.

Love,

Mom

Going Up

Last week something happened to lil Hugh and I that had and still has me shaking.
I faced a fear, although not at all by choice.

We were in a local department store returning a clothing item and I got in store credit.  I wanted to browse and I could because Hugh rests very well in his stroller.  Oh lightening strike me down.  The clothes I wanted to look at were upstairs so we rolled onto the elevator-alone.

I pressed the little white button to go up to the  UL  (upper level).  It started to go up and instead of going all the way up-the elevator bounced.  It bounced in a scary way-not in a you have arrived to your destination sort of way.  Maybe bounce is not the right word.  It sounds too fun.  It jolted.  We jolted. The door did not open for us to get out.  It was silent and I knew we weren't all the way up.  I knew we weren't up and I knew we weren't down.  I knew we were stuck.   But I didn't know what to do. 

My first thought was to hit the "door open" button.  I did it.  Nothing happened.  My second thought was to hit "LL" (lower level) to see if I could go back to where I started....but I also feared that pressing LL would release the brakes and we would fall....to the basement.  But I knew I couldn't call security or the elevator people without pressing the buttons because how silly would I be if I alerted everyone and the solution was the button to go back down.  The button for the UL was still lit up and after a deep breath I pushed the LL button, which also illuminated.  My next step was to hit the alarm button.  It rang the bell for a few seconds and I realized that wasn't going to help much if I truly was stuck between floors.

Meanwhile, lil Hughie woke up and was not the happiest camper.  I was getting hot and sweaty and I'm sure I was talking out loud to myself although I can't remember anything that I said and I wasn't calming down. 

Finally I opened the little silver door that is in every elevator.  I thought there would be a phone to pick up and make a call.  But instead there was a speaker and a white button.  Another button.  I pressed it.  There just was no other option.  I am not sure what I expected.  The lady who answered the call said "Are you stuck in an elevator?".  I shouted back at her "YES and I have a baby!".  Then it was silent.  So I picked up my phone and tried to call Andy.  What was he going to do? I knew there would be no reception.



Finally I yelled "HELLO?" and pressed the button again.  The lady came back on the intercom and asked what floor I was on.  "Um.....I don't think I'm on a floor AND I HAVE A BABY!".  She really didn't say anything else.  I was in full out sweat mode now.  I pressed the button again and said "I'm getting really scared and I have a baby".  I was wondering if I should pick up Hugh and sit on the floor or what the safest thing would be in case we dropped.  You never really hear of an elevator dropping but it is inevitably the first thing that crosses your mind when you are stuck.  Repeating loudly "And I have a baby!" was the only thing I knew I had to do.  I thought playing the baby card would speed things up.

Needless to say-the elevator finally moved and down it went to the LL.  The door opened and we strolled out.  There was not a soul in site-no technician coming to my rescue.  No department store employee bringing me a glass of water.  I looked around, held in my tears and walked out of the store. 
I later called the store to report what happened.  They were so grateful that I called because the elevator company had alerted them and they were in the process of fixing the elevator.  I told them what I had needed in that situation.  I would have appreciated if the person who answered the alarm would have had some training in keeping elevator riders calm.  Maybe if she could have given me a timeline or some information on what she was doing on her end.  She could have offered to call someone for me since my phone didn't work.  Or even if she had been able to tell me that I was in fact on level 2 or between floors or something.  Just something. 

But now what do I do? How do I shake my fear?  I know that I was the best person to be stuck with Hugh-I could feed him and change his diaper and soothe him.  But who was going to soothe me???  How can I go anywhere with a baby stroller and not use an elevator?  I've already faced my fear and ridden in about 3.  But I will be honest, I also have avoided and taken the stairs whenever I could-while Andy took an empty stroller up and down. 

Has this happened to you? If so-share your story with me.....tell me how to face this fear again...tell me you personally know that the breaks on an elevator are perfect and it would never fall.  Tell me!

Today

Today...I woke up frustrated for multiple reasons but I turned the day around.

Today...Eli did a 24 piece puzzle by himself. 

Today...I'm loving the gift Hugh got in the mail.

Isn't that gorgeous?

The back is light blue and white

I tried to get Hughie on here but he was sleeping, so instead I got Eli and Earl.

Today...I am still shaking from getting stuck in an elevator yesterday with Hugh (more to come on this).

Today...I'm proud that I got Hugh to take his morning nap in his crib and I haven't had to tell Eli to be quiet (not because he's not being loud-oh he is! ) because we really want Hugh to learn to sleep through noise.

Today...one part of dinner is already made.

Today...the scale finally said what it did before I got pregnant with Hugh.  But today I am still "flumpy" and Eli asked "Where is it?" when I told him I was flumpy.  Needless to say when I asked if he could see the flump-he pointed to the wrong area on my body...which means I probably have flump all over!

Today...I got a chance to chat with my friend while she waited at the airport.  I also got to email a coworker and set up a playdate, texted with a friend and facetime with my sister. Wow!

Today...I am singing the West Side Story songs in my head.  We had GREAT seats last night and it was my first time away from both boys for that long-and at bedtime. 

Today...I'm smirking at trying to get pictures of Hugh smiling....

Trying...trying...trying to capture it

There he is!!

Today...I'm thankful that Hugh is such an easy baby during the day.

Today...I look forward to tomorrow-a lunch date with my mom and 2 (+ another new baby) friends. 

But today...I am happy where I am-enjoying my moments-not at work-with my little boys-starting over when I need to.

If you are one of my followers, meaning you read my blog on a regular basis, you probably also follow the blog of my good friend Peggy.  Do you?  Well you should!

I just couldn't help sharing how one of her posts made me giggle a few days after she posted it.  That is the great thing about blogging and reading others thoughts-it can resonate with you for a while.You can learn from it, find entertainment or even have an "ah-ha" moment.

This one was pure giggle. Just a giggle  out of the blue.  Check her post here. 
You can even see my comment (from RR) which is the reason I'm posting these pictures.

Hello squirrels.



Do you see him up there?  Look closely....



Pure entertainment for my little boys.....tricky squirrels.