I'm rounding the corner towards another year of being gluten free.
It is my forever.
I try to forget it all the time. But I never can because this girl has to eat...and I can't eat without thinking about it.
I ebb and I flow. I'm usually ok with it when I sit down at the table to eat dinner. I love to watch Eli survey the table and show his excitement when he realizes we are eating the same food.
But I don't thrive on social situations where I need to talk about "it". Restaurants. Friends houses. Get togethers. You know the drill if you've ever eaten with me. I don't avoid it, but I definitely try to minimize the conversation at all costs.
But a few months ago I had a conversation with my friend about which foods I missed. It wasn't so much a conversation as a game. She named 2 foods and I told her which one I missed more. She took the one I missed more and suggested that one against another. I think she was trying to whittle away which foods were at the top of my list. It went something like this:
Her: Chicken tenders or donut holes
Me: Chicken tenders
Her: Chicken tenders or soup at restaurants
Me: Soup at restaurants
Her: Soup at restaurants or white cupcake
Me: soup at restaurants
Her: soup at restaurants or miss grass soup
Me: miss grass soup
Her: Pizza or mrs. grass soup
Me: Mrs. Grass soup
Her: Mrs. Grass soup or garlic bread
Me: garlic bread
Her: Garlic bread or pancakes
I think most would guess that pizza, noodles, cookies, cupcakes, brownies etc would be at the top of the list. And they are. But I found myself waiting for her to add specific foods to the list. I was thinking on ---"I'll have a real hard time making a choice if she add this food into the mix". It was actually a FUN conversation. And I found out that the two things that I miss, maybe not the most but more than I would expect, were garlic bread and cereal. I grew up with a cupboard like this:
We always had an awesome selection of cereal and I really miss the options. I eat all the versions of the chex but I miss so many other flavors, textures, versions. I still keep a cupboard like this in our house for the boys because they are both big cereal eaters, as I'm assuming Hughie will be too. So I try to be a good sport. I've tried adding nuts and dried fruit to my cereal. I even tried chocolate chips. But it's not the same and it always ends up at the bottom of the bowl.
We didn't eat a lot of garlic bread growing up and I don't know why I miss it. But I can feel more saliva in my mouth when I think about a bread stick from pizza hut or olive garden. I have not found a gluten free version to compete with the texture of chewy garlic bread. It breaks my heart. I also miss toast. It's so hard for me to go out to eat for breakfast because I want toast with my eggs. I just do. I have gluten free bread at home that works great for toast-but I am NOT lying to you when I tell you the bread is 1/2 the size of regular bread (therefore the loaf is half the size of a regular loaf) and it is $6 a loaf. Ohhhh that hurts when you want a sandwich or a piece of toast with eggs.
It's really weird being gluten free. I can still remember the way foods feel falling apart in my mouth. And sometimes that's all I miss. The texture. For example when offered a Cool Ranch Dorito, it just doesn't have the same mouth feel as a regular dorito. My favorite candy bar was a kit kat but the chocolate covered gluten free waffers do not compare.
Will I survive? Yes. I know I know. I'm whining.
I want to know what you THINK you'd miss. Be honest. It might be something you eat every day or it could be something you eat once a year. It could be a childhood favorite that you only eat on special occasions and can't imagine never having that 1 time a year. It could be an ice cold Miller Light or Corona with your friends at a picnic or summerfest. Maybe it's your grandma's pancakes. It's probably a favorite pie on Thanksgiving? Or your mom's lasagna. Perhaps any version of macaroni and cheese? What about a sauce on your chicken or chicken dumpling soup? Chicken Lo Mein or grilled cheese? Nestle crunch bars or twix? Chocolate chip cookie dough icecream? Apple crisp? Crackers with your soup or cheese and crackers at parties? Pasta salad or a burger bun? A good sub sandwich? Alfredo or a dinner roll or a favorite cereal? A granola or breakfast bar or struedel?
I also want to know-would you cheat? Would you allow yourself to give in and indulge or would you fear the consequences? Would it force you to "remember" the taste and texture for a longer time (in other words, causing you to hold on to the memories for too long?)
