1. The snow today was pretty. The roads were not bad. So far the winter has been very mild. My office does not have windows, but the routes that I walk all day are surrounded by hundreds of windows where I can glance, stare, gaze or dream through. Today it was gorgeous to see the white, swirly snow.
2. A good doc is hard to come by. I know I have proclaimed this before. I have been lucky to work with a whole big bunch of good ones. My new doctor emailed me last night at 10 pm! I woke up to have my questions answered in such a timely manner (I had emailed him at 7 pm). He treats me with respect, dignity and makes me feel like my little issues are the most important part of his day. Bottom line-if you don't feel this way about your doctor-seek one out that makes you feel safe and important and whom you trust.
3. A new baby is coming into my life soon...very soon? I'm OHHHHHHHHH so excited. Go Sarah Go! Go Ed Go! The thought of boy/girl/boy/girl shoots through my mind hour to hour and helps me through my day. I can't wait to meet this little bundle of joy. I love to hear my sisters daily thoughts about her 2 boys, what this next child will bring, the fears, anxieties, anticipations and love for this new special child. I hope labor is quick and painless Sarah!
4. Tomorrow will be my first full gluten free day. I have been doing breakfast and lunch gluten free the last few days but tomorrow is the beginning of the end ;) I know all you optimists can't wait for my pity party post to come out....it's on it's way soon. Basically I want to just list all the foods I will miss, and those I am most excited about. I promise to update those who asked on how I feel after a few days of full/strict diet.
5. On that same note: support, support, support. I have a ton of support seeping in all over the place. It's a wonderful pick me up. My mom has been ever so sensitive and caring to listen to me. My sister says the right things at all the right times. My brother asked a bunch of questions about my procedure that let me talk about it (therapeutic for me). My friend PW called a local Mexican joint to ask if the chips and salsa are gluten free (YES IT IS!!!). My friend CF left me a VERY VERY special and nice comment on a previous blog post. My husband practiced reading labels last night and that left a smile on my face. He also cleaned out the toaster and my "side" is labeled with a pink R sticker. A co-worker of mine left me a little surprise of a bag of gluten free breadcrumbs on my desk at work. My aunt lit a candle at church for me a few weeks ago. A few bookclub friends have emailed and sent me words of support. And my meal group has convinced me to maintain membership!
6. Eli is now trying to say so many words. He even attempts thank you and knows how to do the sign language for it even though I didn't teach him. I am grateful to find out he is learning things here and there at day care without my motherly push. Another cute Eli-ism: he now is putting a few words together. After nap we ask him to leave Teddy in his crib. Eli then said "Bye-Bye Teddy". We got over excited and congratulatory with him and now when he says bye bye-he says "bye bye teddy" no matter who he is talking to.
7. Bailee (woof) continues to sleep on the floor for 98% of the night and I love her for it. I miss her cuddle but I do believe it's helping us get a little more rest at night.
8. I have an intern with me at work which is tough. I feel as though being in teaching mode makes my day drag a little slower as I'm talking not only to patients but then after each appointment I then explain, ask, go over details with her. It's hard for me to get everything done and even check my email. I have been missing corresponding with my usual email buds. She is very nice and despite everything taking a little longer, it has been a blessing to have someone there to keep my mind off "things" and stay focused on work.
9. There is more to be thankful for...like a husband who always offers to shovel and is supportive to me in every which way is possible. A good book. A hot bath. A glass of wine. Fresh sheets on the bed. Popcorn. and more and more and more.............
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Saturday, January 8, 2011
Me
Some of you may know I have had a couple of extra doctor appointments recently. It's time I post an update on me.
Let's clear up 1 thing right away. No I'm not pregnant. Hopefully someday that will be the case, but not right now.
Although I'm not quite ready to even really admit or accept everything that has happened in the last few weeks, I feel as if my blog is therapy for me and also a way to communicate. I don't expect that from the words I type and share will make any sense for anyone else. I can only imagine people reading what I write and some may tip his/her head while they read, others may widen their eyes, or furrow their brows. Some could roll their eyes or click off the post if it annoys them-as to some it may not be a big deal or matter at all. To Andy, Elijah and I it is a big life long change.
I had some blood work done, a genetic test and an EGD (endoscopy). Since I have received those results I have had a hard time admitting that I actually have a diagnosis. I have a difficult time actually SAYING the words. Andy and friends and family are helping me to remind me "Yes Raina, you have it.". I think it may be a defense mechanism....I giggle and say "but what if I don't?" I'm usually a pessimist so you'd think the moment I got the lab work back I would have assumed I had it. But before the genetic test and the EGD I was 95% sure I didn't have it.
What is it you ask?
Here it is.
I have Celiac's Disease.
I
Have
Celiac's
Disease.
If you don't know what it is-here is a brief description: Celiac disease is a digestive disease that damages the small intestine and interferes with absorption of nutrients from food. People who have celiac disease cannot tolerate gluten, a protein in wheat, rye, and barley. Gluten is found mainly in foods but may also be found in everyday products such as medicines, vitamins, and lip balms. When people with celiac disease eat foods or use products containing gluten, their immune system responds by damaging or destroying villi—the tiny, fingerlike protrusions lining the small intestine. Villi normally allow nutrients from food to be absorbed through the walls of the small intestine into the bloodstream. Without healthy villi, a person becomes malnourished, no matter how much food one eats.
In the last 4 days I have told many people. And I get mixed responses. Most people just list the foods I can still eat. Others respond by telling me it's perfect that I'm a dietitian-my own best resource. I can't really define how I've been feeling about it except a lot of denial, a lot of questions, fear and a little anger. Oh yeah and a whole HUGE amount of disbelief. Andy is helping a ton as well as family and close friends. Because my genetic test came back positive-Elijah now has to be tested and it is also recommended that my parents and siblings get tested. They may carry the gene (making them 10 times more likely to get celiac's disease) or not.
Many are asking if this could have had anything to do with Elijah and what happened when he was born. We don't know yet-but we are going to be active to try to find out! My GI specialist is doing some research for me and has already said he has found some mixed research. Because I carry the gene-I just needed something to "trigger" it. Many websites list triggers such as surgery, emotional trauma, virus, labor or pregnancy. Andy and I believe I may have been triggered during pregnancy and this is why Eli had a few health issues when he is born. If this is the case, it will be a blessing in disguise when/if we decide to have another baby-as my intestines can heal and provide better nutrition for our baby.
So...as everyone that knows me really well knows that my favorite comfort food of buttered noodles are now out of the question. Trust me-I will blog about this over and over again in the next few weeks (I'm sure). I know there is a "pity party" post coming soon. I feel I have the RIGHT to list all the foods I will miss. Even if there is a gluten free version of the food-it won't taste as good or the same to me. Food is a major part of my life as I talk about it with people 8-10 hours of my day as well as plan out my meals and live for my next meal/snack. I told my sister instead of emailing about meals and upcoming social menus....I should focus on something else. Maybe fashion? Ha! I need to get "involved" in something else.
I know I will adapt. I know I will be fine. I won't die-it's a disease that is totally in my own control. But it's not fun. I don't like to eat eggs without toast. I love cold cereal. I enjoy pasta dishes. I like to use sauces and salad dressings. I LOVE soup etc. I'm a social eater-I enjoy going to restaurants and eating with friends and I'm nervous that it might change.
But I'm attempting to look on the bright side. It may help with various "things" with my body that I will be happy with.
I try to explain it to Andy ( an athlete and sports lover). I tell him he cannot (Forever and ever, for the rest of his life) watch Basketball or football on tv or live games. No NFL, no college ball, no high school or even if Eli plays. He can watch soccer, swimming and horse races. But those are the only sports he can watch. If he wants ANYTHING to do with football or basketball-he is only allowed to watch people play video game versions of those sports. I think that was a good comparison.
Tonight Elijah, Andy and I made our first trip to a grocery store other than where we usually shop. Eli shouted "Thomas!! Thomas!!" the whole time. I tried to label read. Andy walked along. There were a LOT of people at this store. We left the store with a few (new) items and put them on "my shelf". Tomorrow we will clean out the 2 slots on the right side of the toaster for me (andy will use the left side) and I will get my own peanut butter, mayo, jelly and butter as cross contamination can also be a problem-therefore he can't dip his used knife into the same item I will use. Andy and I have a lot of reading to do. A lot of learning to do.
I will survive. I can control this disease. That's the perfect kind of disease for me.
Let's clear up 1 thing right away. No I'm not pregnant. Hopefully someday that will be the case, but not right now.
Although I'm not quite ready to even really admit or accept everything that has happened in the last few weeks, I feel as if my blog is therapy for me and also a way to communicate. I don't expect that from the words I type and share will make any sense for anyone else. I can only imagine people reading what I write and some may tip his/her head while they read, others may widen their eyes, or furrow their brows. Some could roll their eyes or click off the post if it annoys them-as to some it may not be a big deal or matter at all. To Andy, Elijah and I it is a big life long change.
I had some blood work done, a genetic test and an EGD (endoscopy). Since I have received those results I have had a hard time admitting that I actually have a diagnosis. I have a difficult time actually SAYING the words. Andy and friends and family are helping me to remind me "Yes Raina, you have it.". I think it may be a defense mechanism....I giggle and say "but what if I don't?" I'm usually a pessimist so you'd think the moment I got the lab work back I would have assumed I had it. But before the genetic test and the EGD I was 95% sure I didn't have it.
What is it you ask?
Here it is.
I have Celiac's Disease.
I
Have
Celiac's
Disease.
If you don't know what it is-here is a brief description: Celiac disease is a digestive disease that damages the small intestine and interferes with absorption of nutrients from food. People who have celiac disease cannot tolerate gluten, a protein in wheat, rye, and barley. Gluten is found mainly in foods but may also be found in everyday products such as medicines, vitamins, and lip balms. When people with celiac disease eat foods or use products containing gluten, their immune system responds by damaging or destroying villi—the tiny, fingerlike protrusions lining the small intestine. Villi normally allow nutrients from food to be absorbed through the walls of the small intestine into the bloodstream. Without healthy villi, a person becomes malnourished, no matter how much food one eats.
In the last 4 days I have told many people. And I get mixed responses. Most people just list the foods I can still eat. Others respond by telling me it's perfect that I'm a dietitian-my own best resource. I can't really define how I've been feeling about it except a lot of denial, a lot of questions, fear and a little anger. Oh yeah and a whole HUGE amount of disbelief. Andy is helping a ton as well as family and close friends. Because my genetic test came back positive-Elijah now has to be tested and it is also recommended that my parents and siblings get tested. They may carry the gene (making them 10 times more likely to get celiac's disease) or not.
Many are asking if this could have had anything to do with Elijah and what happened when he was born. We don't know yet-but we are going to be active to try to find out! My GI specialist is doing some research for me and has already said he has found some mixed research. Because I carry the gene-I just needed something to "trigger" it. Many websites list triggers such as surgery, emotional trauma, virus, labor or pregnancy. Andy and I believe I may have been triggered during pregnancy and this is why Eli had a few health issues when he is born. If this is the case, it will be a blessing in disguise when/if we decide to have another baby-as my intestines can heal and provide better nutrition for our baby.
So...as everyone that knows me really well knows that my favorite comfort food of buttered noodles are now out of the question. Trust me-I will blog about this over and over again in the next few weeks (I'm sure). I know there is a "pity party" post coming soon. I feel I have the RIGHT to list all the foods I will miss. Even if there is a gluten free version of the food-it won't taste as good or the same to me. Food is a major part of my life as I talk about it with people 8-10 hours of my day as well as plan out my meals and live for my next meal/snack. I told my sister instead of emailing about meals and upcoming social menus....I should focus on something else. Maybe fashion? Ha! I need to get "involved" in something else.
I know I will adapt. I know I will be fine. I won't die-it's a disease that is totally in my own control. But it's not fun. I don't like to eat eggs without toast. I love cold cereal. I enjoy pasta dishes. I like to use sauces and salad dressings. I LOVE soup etc. I'm a social eater-I enjoy going to restaurants and eating with friends and I'm nervous that it might change.
But I'm attempting to look on the bright side. It may help with various "things" with my body that I will be happy with.
I try to explain it to Andy ( an athlete and sports lover). I tell him he cannot (Forever and ever, for the rest of his life) watch Basketball or football on tv or live games. No NFL, no college ball, no high school or even if Eli plays. He can watch soccer, swimming and horse races. But those are the only sports he can watch. If he wants ANYTHING to do with football or basketball-he is only allowed to watch people play video game versions of those sports. I think that was a good comparison.
Tonight Elijah, Andy and I made our first trip to a grocery store other than where we usually shop. Eli shouted "Thomas!! Thomas!!" the whole time. I tried to label read. Andy walked along. There were a LOT of people at this store. We left the store with a few (new) items and put them on "my shelf". Tomorrow we will clean out the 2 slots on the right side of the toaster for me (andy will use the left side) and I will get my own peanut butter, mayo, jelly and butter as cross contamination can also be a problem-therefore he can't dip his used knife into the same item I will use. Andy and I have a lot of reading to do. A lot of learning to do.
I will survive. I can control this disease. That's the perfect kind of disease for me.
Zooooom into boyhood
Today Elijah had his first haircut! It really was just a trim. Just a little snip in the back and around the ears. Of course I was prepared for him to look less like a baby and more like a man. But I wasn't expected for it to go so fast! Half way through the "cut" I realized I hadn't even asked if we could save some. She had already started collecting! Eli sat in his little blue car and mostly frowned and wiggled. He didn't really cry but he seemed confused that something was touching the back of his head. He kept turning around when the "buzzer" or "vacuum" started behind him. I took some before and after shots. He doesn't have enough on top or in the front-so it truly was just a trim around the ears and in the back.
 |
| Before...a view of Eli in the mirror |
 |
| see those long wisps in the back? |
 |
| and the wisps around his ear.....about to disappear! |
 |
| He mostly frowned the whole time...But holds his beloved "Thomas" in his hands! |
 |
| After! |
 |
| I LOVE love love love love this handsome little BOY! |
Blessing
A blessing is when your child sleeps.
Don't get me wrong-I love all the lay-on-the-floor play, the chasing, the kid songs and character voices. I cherish moments when he tries the sit and spin, learns new words, draws with crayons or asks for a snack. I know I am blessed for all of this.
But when he sleeps....I am also blessed.
Eli was not a great sleeper in his 1st year of life. His naps were never over an hour and he nursed until he was 9 months+ so he never slept longer than 2- 3 hour chunks. My sister often would remind me as I trudged through my 8-10 hour work day that he would not sleep so poorly for his whole life. That lack of sleep I was experiencing was only a "small part of his long long life". That was one of the only things that really helped me-was to know that he wouldn't be a poor sleeper until he was 18. By the time he was 8 I expected him to be sleeping 8 hour chunks. I COULD survive until he was 8-I could if I had to. Luckily I didn't have to wait until he was 18 or 8. He is 18 months old. He sleeps 12-13 hours at night (wowowow!) and takes 1 nap that is anywhere from 2-3 hours long.
The best part is that he GOES to sleep well. Our routine holds us all together and I love it. I cherish it. It is one of the many favorite moments of my day. I love to click off the bed side lamp after reading books and just rock with him in my lap. Those 5 minutes of rocking I get to experience a silent and tranquil Eli. He doesn't squirm. He doesn't try to talk or play. He sits on my laps and rubs his Teddy by his ear and rocks with me. Usually I talk quietly to him-telling him all the amazing things he did that day, how special he is to me and what excitement is to come the next day. After this I turn him around, give him a hug and a kiss (or 10) and lay him down. He doesn't usually make a peep after that.
That's the blessing. Andy and I are no longer looking at each other in disbelief-wondering what the heck is going on up there or if he needs his nuk, or is he's cold, bored, not tired, sick, teething, pooping etc etc etc.
I am recording this, blogging this, sharing this-so that I can look back someday. Hopefully we'll have a #2 (although currently there is NO #2-I'm not lying Jessica!) and I will need to remind myself that it ends-it stops-they are quiet-they sleep.
And it never fails- that's when the missing-him starts.
Good luck Sarah-the next few months may be sleepless for you. I will try to remind you that it won't last forever! Hope you get a GREAT sleeper.
Don't get me wrong-I love all the lay-on-the-floor play, the chasing, the kid songs and character voices. I cherish moments when he tries the sit and spin, learns new words, draws with crayons or asks for a snack. I know I am blessed for all of this.
But when he sleeps....I am also blessed.
Eli was not a great sleeper in his 1st year of life. His naps were never over an hour and he nursed until he was 9 months+ so he never slept longer than 2- 3 hour chunks. My sister often would remind me as I trudged through my 8-10 hour work day that he would not sleep so poorly for his whole life. That lack of sleep I was experiencing was only a "small part of his long long life". That was one of the only things that really helped me-was to know that he wouldn't be a poor sleeper until he was 18. By the time he was 8 I expected him to be sleeping 8 hour chunks. I COULD survive until he was 8-I could if I had to. Luckily I didn't have to wait until he was 18 or 8. He is 18 months old. He sleeps 12-13 hours at night (wowowow!) and takes 1 nap that is anywhere from 2-3 hours long.
The best part is that he GOES to sleep well. Our routine holds us all together and I love it. I cherish it. It is one of the many favorite moments of my day. I love to click off the bed side lamp after reading books and just rock with him in my lap. Those 5 minutes of rocking I get to experience a silent and tranquil Eli. He doesn't squirm. He doesn't try to talk or play. He sits on my laps and rubs his Teddy by his ear and rocks with me. Usually I talk quietly to him-telling him all the amazing things he did that day, how special he is to me and what excitement is to come the next day. After this I turn him around, give him a hug and a kiss (or 10) and lay him down. He doesn't usually make a peep after that.
That's the blessing. Andy and I are no longer looking at each other in disbelief-wondering what the heck is going on up there or if he needs his nuk, or is he's cold, bored, not tired, sick, teething, pooping etc etc etc.
I am recording this, blogging this, sharing this-so that I can look back someday. Hopefully we'll have a #2 (although currently there is NO #2-I'm not lying Jessica!) and I will need to remind myself that it ends-it stops-they are quiet-they sleep.
And it never fails- that's when the missing-him starts.
Good luck Sarah-the next few months may be sleepless for you. I will try to remind you that it won't last forever! Hope you get a GREAT sleeper.
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
He talks!
Eli has been talking for a while but as of 2-3 days ago he has started repeating everything we say. Some words are clear as a bell and some are just attempts.
Take note-when he says "momma" and "daddy" his voice changes. You can tell in his heart that he is just warmer and sincere with love when he says our names. (Or that's what I keep telling myself!).
Take note-when he says "momma" and "daddy" his voice changes. You can tell in his heart that he is just warmer and sincere with love when he says our names. (Or that's what I keep telling myself!).
Sunday, January 2, 2011
18 Months
Hey you!
It's me....1 1/2 year old Elijah. I'm doing well-thanks for wondering. Mommy hasn't let me on her blog for a while because she thinks I'm getting a little sassy these days. I'm 18 months old and getting smarter each and every day. I had a chance to visit with Dr. B last week. He said I checked out well! I'm developing just as I should. AND!! a big AND--I'm growing well too. I finally hit the 20 lb mark (actually 21 lbs 3 oz) and now my mom and dad can turn my car seat around. I'm still less than the 3rd%ile but I gained 2 lbs in the last 3 months. I'm 32.5 inches tall and that puts me around the 50%ile. My head measures me into the 25-50%ile. I didn't have to get any shots because I had an ear infection and a fever so Dr. B "let it slide".
I'm super busy these days. I really don't like to sit still at all. I'm on the move running and hopping and trotting everywhere. I like to climb, in and out, over and under. I'm into "nack" (snack) and Thomas the Train.
I love to help mom and dad put blocks away, throw out the garbage and sit on top of Bailee. I'm only taking 1 nap a day and I still sleep almost 12 hours every night. Here are my fun facts:
-When dad watches football I like to stand in front of the tv and move my fist like him. I yell "Go, Go, Go" and "ootball"
-I am trying to say a lot of words. My favorite right now is "Thon-ih" (thomas the train), Elmo, Bye Bye, Momma, Teddy, Dog, Bath, Boots, Snack (nack), Book, night night etc
-I try to climb on the couch because I am such a big boy when I sit on it. Then I like to sit as close to Bailee as possible. Sometimes she even lets me sit on top of her.
-I hear talk of mom and dad taking away my Nuk. I'm nervous. It's a soother to me.
-I got a new tool bench for Christmas. I love it-it's perfect for me.
-My favorite foods are peas, strawberries, cheese and tomatoes
-I love my bath, bubbles and new tub toys!
-My all time favorite book right now is the foot book. Both mom and dad can almost recite it by memory because we have read it so many times. I also love books that have things for me to touch or move. I only sit on laps for books before bed. But often I will sit on the floor and look at books by myself.
-I love the big mega blocks and spongy blocks.
-I got a broom and a lawn mower for Christmas. I also got a zhu-zhu pet. I love to chase it and I giggle when I pick it up.
-My platelet count (270,000) and other labs looked great at the last draw!
I have enjoyed the little snow that we've had but I can't wait for this summer when I can go outside and play in the backyard again. That's all for now. I'm also attaching a few pictures of me.
Love you all,
Mr. Elijah (bubs, E-casey, E-bugs, Eli)
It's me....1 1/2 year old Elijah. I'm doing well-thanks for wondering. Mommy hasn't let me on her blog for a while because she thinks I'm getting a little sassy these days. I'm 18 months old and getting smarter each and every day. I had a chance to visit with Dr. B last week. He said I checked out well! I'm developing just as I should. AND!! a big AND--I'm growing well too. I finally hit the 20 lb mark (actually 21 lbs 3 oz) and now my mom and dad can turn my car seat around. I'm still less than the 3rd%ile but I gained 2 lbs in the last 3 months. I'm 32.5 inches tall and that puts me around the 50%ile. My head measures me into the 25-50%ile. I didn't have to get any shots because I had an ear infection and a fever so Dr. B "let it slide".
I'm super busy these days. I really don't like to sit still at all. I'm on the move running and hopping and trotting everywhere. I like to climb, in and out, over and under. I'm into "nack" (snack) and Thomas the Train.
I love to help mom and dad put blocks away, throw out the garbage and sit on top of Bailee. I'm only taking 1 nap a day and I still sleep almost 12 hours every night. Here are my fun facts:
-When dad watches football I like to stand in front of the tv and move my fist like him. I yell "Go, Go, Go" and "ootball"
-I am trying to say a lot of words. My favorite right now is "Thon-ih" (thomas the train), Elmo, Bye Bye, Momma, Teddy, Dog, Bath, Boots, Snack (nack), Book, night night etc
-I try to climb on the couch because I am such a big boy when I sit on it. Then I like to sit as close to Bailee as possible. Sometimes she even lets me sit on top of her.
-I hear talk of mom and dad taking away my Nuk. I'm nervous. It's a soother to me.
-I got a new tool bench for Christmas. I love it-it's perfect for me.
-My favorite foods are peas, strawberries, cheese and tomatoes
-I love my bath, bubbles and new tub toys!
-My all time favorite book right now is the foot book. Both mom and dad can almost recite it by memory because we have read it so many times. I also love books that have things for me to touch or move. I only sit on laps for books before bed. But often I will sit on the floor and look at books by myself.
-I love the big mega blocks and spongy blocks.
-I got a broom and a lawn mower for Christmas. I also got a zhu-zhu pet. I love to chase it and I giggle when I pick it up.
-My platelet count (270,000) and other labs looked great at the last draw!
I have enjoyed the little snow that we've had but I can't wait for this summer when I can go outside and play in the backyard again. That's all for now. I'm also attaching a few pictures of me.
Love you all,
Mr. Elijah (bubs, E-casey, E-bugs, Eli)
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